Wendy Jackson
Courage in the Face of Loss. A Story of Love and Tragedy
A Texas native shares her story of grief after the loss of her husband, Michael James Jackson, caused by a wrong-way driver. She is hopeful that from this tragedy in her life, something good will come in the form of a cell phone alert—the Michael Alert—that will warn drivers of wrong-way drivers and help save lives.
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Where did you grow up, and where did you first meet your husband, Michael James Jackson?
I was born and raised in Dallas, Texas. Michael was born and raised in Seattle, Washington. He relocated to Dallas a few years we met in Dallas. We had mutual friends and ran in the same circles but never met, then one Labor Day weekend in 2011, we met and then became friends for some time before we started dating.
You worked as a teacher but grew up wanting to be an attorney?
Yes, I was a teacher. I went to college in Dallas, worked in legal for a few years, and eventually entered the education field. I mainly taught second grade for the first few years of my career. At the time I left teaching, I was a pre-K teacher.
But, yes, the entire time I was growing up and going through the school system, it was ingrained in my head that I wanted to become an attorney. But once I got into the legal field, took my LSAT, and went through all those hoops, I realized that maybe that wasn’t necessarily what I wanted to do. Then I got married, and wanted to be more present as a wife and a mother.
When I stepped away from my legal job, I wanted to have the flexibility of being a partner to my spouse but also be present not only for my spouse but for our children. I considered what other career would give me flexibility but also where I could feel like I was, in some way, giving back, and that happened to be education.
Do you feel that your passion for being an attorney prepared you for what you are going through now?
I met Michael when I was taking my LSAT. I was already working in legal, I had many colleagues in the legal profession, and one of my best friends was an attorney. I remember thinking, “You’re spending 18-hour days in the office.”
That was the key thing that kept me from pursuing Law. Now, having gone through everything that I’ve been through, it has crossed my mind.
Tell me about Michael. What made you say to yourself that he was the one?
That’s such a difficult question. You don’t meet many people and automatically click with them. When you first meet, you never think this will turn into a romantic relationship that will make you feel comfortable, safe, and understood. And yet, with Michael, that’s what it was.
Michael had a way with people where he genuinely cared. He didn’t have to know you for years to care about you. He would meet you and automatically have a sense of wanting to get to know you. He would motivate you and hype you up. He was a big promoter of everyone in his circle of friends at work, colleagues, and acquaintances. It was a no-brainer that he was the person I would end up spending my future with.
Growing up in Dallas and being of Hispanic background, Michael a biracial kid from Seattle, not knowing his father, and being raised by a single mom, in some way, I feel like he understood me because I was also raised by a single mom. He got me. It was so important that we could cultivate a friendship before dating. It didn’t take very long because he had a bigger-than-life personality. We dated for a few years before getting married.
Another thing I loved about Michael was that he loved his mother so much, which showed in everything he did. He left home and moved to Dallas because he knew he could do more for his mom by working in Dallas, where he knew he could provide a better life for her back home.
Tell me about Michael’s line of work.
Michael worked for AT&T corporate for almost 20 years. As I mentioned, he started his career in Seattle. As he rose in the ranks of his corporate career, he got an opportunity to relocate to Dallas. He often told the story like this: “I sold everything in my apartment, got in my car, and drove 2,000 miles to Dallas. I got here within a day, and I showed up to work on Monday.” His boss thought he was crazy.
He worked in technology, a very fast-paced career with much innovation. Every day, it’s changing. Michael had the biggest heart, and it showed through day in and day out with everybody he knew. I’ve been told that if you wanted to find Michael at AT&T, all you had to do was look out on the floor, and there you would see a crowd, and in the middle, you would find Michael. People gravitated towards him. His colleagues, acquaintances, and peers lovingly called him MJ.
Later in his career, he dedicated himself to using technology for social good. I think that’s a key thing to highlight because, on top of all the projects he had in his day-to-day career at AT&T, which were all very important, as he could save the company millions of dollars in revenue. He was even tapped by the CEO of Microsoft, Satya Nadella for a certain project.
What is the Michael Alert?
After Michael passed, it was so hard to find the silver lining. There were so many questions I asked myself, “Why did this happen? What is the purpose? “God, why him? Why now? Why this way?” He was a perfectly happy, healthy, a good person, and I’m not just saying that because he was my husband. You can ask anybody who knew him, and they will share the same sentiment.
Michael had this team of developers and engineers he managed for a few years. He called it the Carbon Team. A lot of them don’t live in Texas anymore. They’re spread out across the country. Since his passing, we had many conversations asking, “What would Michael want? How would he want us to live out his legacy?” For one, I know he would want us not to be upset because he’s not here in the physical sense. He would want us to, in some way, help ensure that this doesn’t happen to someone else so that other people, whether it’s a spouse, a child, or any family member, aren’t affected the same way our families and I have been.
I filed a lawsuit where I sued the establishment that overserved alcohol to the woman who killed Michael. A lot of investigative research was done. We learned that on the freeway where Michael was traveling, technology is in place. It notifies law enforcement and the Tollway Authority when a car is going the wrong way. However, what is not in place – and has yet to be developed in 2024 – an alert where you or I can receive a notification if someone is coming in our direction if we are in imminent danger. The evening Michael passed, that woman drove in the wrong direction for approximately eight minutes.
That’s a long time to be traveling in the wrong direction. The technology in place that detected her going the wrong way worked. All the neighboring jurisdictions, in terms of law enforcement, were notified that there was a wrong-way driver. The highway authority was able to see her going the wrong way. They could see what car it was, the color, the make, the model, all those things. The only people who didn’t know that there was a wrong-way driver were those in harm’s way, and one of those people happened to be my husband, Michael.
Now it is up to me to make a difference and speak for Michael. It’s through him that I’m able to wake up every day because if I don’t and if I didn’t push through, I wouldn’t be doing him any justice.
Do you have numbers for approximately how many people a year are killed by wrong-way drivers?
Yes. It’s shocking. Michael passed in 2022. We pulled stats for just my area, the Dallas-Fort Worth area, and learned that in 2021, there were 1.6 wrong-way drivers per day. It’s now 2024, and those numbers have been dramatically rising. I can only imagine what they look like today. That was four years ago.
The general public isn’t privy to that information. The only reason I know this is because of the lawsuit I brought forward. Otherwise, no one would know.
When did the idea of the Michael Alert system first come to you?
Michael passed in August, and the idea came about around November. I’d already filed the lawsuit, and certain things were coming out. I was going through the process and learning many things about what happened that night, with specific details. I couldn’t believe she drove in the wrong direction for eight minutes. I couldn’t believe she was overserved alcohol at the bar.
There were so many things that went wrong that evening, and you realize that they could have been prevented. The highway authority has an office and headquarters where people like you and me sit monitoring the cameras. They’re watching all of this as it’s happening in real-time. There is live footage of her. She was moving at about 70 miles an hour.
Knowing that it could have been prevented, knowing that so many things went wrong, made me more aware of what I needed to do and that I needed to act. I’m so blessed to have a big support system, not only with family and friends but at his former company, with many people who are knowledgeable in technology.
Who was the first person with whom you discussed the idea?
His best friend, Mike Linneman, who lives in Dallas. I talked to him and asked, “What can we do about this tragedy? What would Michael want us to do?”
I spent much time with Mike and his wife, Allie, every weekend and sometimes even during the week. He said, “Michael would want us to somehow, in some way, prevent this from happening to anyone else.” I said, “I know, but how?” He said, “It has to be some type of notification.” That’s when I said, “Like an Amber Alert?” He said, “Yes, just like that.” I can remember exactly where I was sitting when we had that conversation.
I was sitting in a parking lot on the side of the Dallas North Tollway. It was probably ten, eleven o’clock at night. Then Mike said, “Okay, we’ve got to figure out a solution.” That November, the entire Carbon Team came into town for our annual Christmas dinner. Michael used to do a Christmas dinner for his team every year.
And so, after Michael’s passing, I wanted to do the same for them. I invited Mike, and we took the opportunity to talk to each of the team members about the idea. They all said they would put their heads together and figure it out. It didn’t take very long. We figured out that currently, there are capabilities just like the Amber Alert and the Silver Alert. The Silver Alert is like an Amber Alert, only used for seniors – if an elderly person is in danger or goes missing. The Michael Alert would use the same integration system that allows the push notification to go out like an Amber or Silver Alert. If you or I are traveling on the freeway or a tollway and a wrong-way driver is coming in your direction, you would get the Michael Alert on your car. It would let you know that you are in proximity of a wrong-way driver, and you need to either go to your nearest exit or veer over to the right shoulder to get out of harm’s way.
With all the new cars and technology, most smartphones, iPhones, and Androids, have capabilities to be connected to your car, like Apple CarPlay and Android Auto. It’s so
simple. The capability is there to push this notification and save lives. The design part of it is done, and the solution is done. The Carbon Team and I have met with local officials, state officials, and politicians. We’ve also met with the Departments of Transportation here in Texas. We haven’t necessarily gotten the support needed to get this proof of concept done. The first time we pitched it, I believe, was March of 2023.
Of all the people we have met during this journey, nobody ever told us, “This is a horrible idea. This will never work. This doesn’t need to be used.” At the same time, we never quite got the support. Only most recently, with all the media attention gotten by being featured on the local and national channels, one of the same Departments of Transportation reached out and expressed that they wanted to support and help us. That was only a few months ago, and we haven’t heard back.
Are most wrong-way drivers intoxicated?
Yes. The majority are intoxicated. In Michael’s case, several people saw her get in the car. I know this because it was all caught on video. They let her walk out, even though she was stumbling as she tried walking. Nobody cared enough to put her in a shared car, offer to drive her home, or make sure she was safe not only for herself but for those around her.
Did the woman who killed Michael survive?
No. She passed. I’ve been told that typically, when something like this happens, the drunk driver survives. When I got Michael’s death notification at my front door, one of the first questions I asked was, “Who is he?” Where is he? Is he in jail?” I thought it was a man. My mind was racing a mile a minute. The state troopers said, “Ma’am, it wasn’t he, it was she, and she also passed.” I was in shock that it was a woman.
What’s holding up the Michael Alert from becoming a reality? And what’s the next step?
The next step is finding the right people to support it, the right champions who care enough to get behind it, who are in the right positions to be able to pitch it and get it implemented.
As I mentioned, we met with TxDOT twice (Texas Department of Transportation for the entire state of Texas). The first time, they gave us the runaround and weren’t very supportive. We met with them recently, and they expressed some support, but we haven’t heard back. They’re the ones who can put it in front of the people who can get this pitched and get a proof of concept. This is a time-sensitive issue. If this could happen to my husband, it can happen to anyone. People spend so much time in their vehicles driving on freeways in metropolitan areas. When a car comes at you at 70 miles an hour on the freeway, you need to know in real-time that you are in imminent danger.
Is it frustrating to know that those who should be jumping on board are not doing so?
Yes. The Department of Transportation says, “ Safety is our number one. This is what we do for a living. This is what our careers are.” I live 20 minutes outside of Dallas, and I have to get on George Bush Turnpike every day to get to where I am going. There is no alternate route unless I take surface streets, which take twice as long. I have to pay tolls to use that road. So, I am paying the State. And so, you would think it would be safe. The North Texas Tollway Authorities are the people who oversee the George Bush Turnpike. They’re the ones that oversee the same Sam Rayburn freeway. They’re the same people in charge of the Dallas North Tollway. They are the same people who had visibility and were watching as this woman was driving the wrong way for eight minutes. They witnessed her car slam into Michael’s car. They’re the same people who have given me the runaround. It’s extremely frustrating.
If you go to their website, it says that safety is their first priority from incident to clean up, whether it’s a blown-out tire, your car is stalled on the side of the road, or you have a medical emergency. I believe their average time is 16 to 17 minutes. However, that intoxicated woman was stopped on the side of the road for 55 minutes, and nobody went over there to check on her. And it’s all captured on camera by the North Texas Tollway Authority.
That woman could have been on the phone, having a crisis, or she could have had a seizure or fallen asleep. We don’t know. No one knows because no one went to check up on her! All we know is that at some point, she decided to turn her car around and start driving into oncoming traffic. Given the toxicology reports, she had more than double the alcohol limit in her system and that it was due to intoxication. And the North Texas Tollway Authority can’t be held accountable. However, if you go to their website, they claim that safety is their first priority.
And then there is also the pushback from the Department of Transportation, which has said things like, “Some people may not want to get the alert at 2:00 am.” And that’s understandable. Just like with the Amber Alert, you can opt-in or opt-out on your phone if you don’t want to get it. Realistically, who would want to opt-out when your own life is in danger? If you have children, you want to know if your child is coming home safely driving on the freeway. You would want to know.
So, there’s no turning back in your quest to make the Michael Alert a reality?
There is no turning back. It must become a real thing. Michael’s passing can’t be in vain.
Do you enjoy cooking? Do you have hobbies?
When Michael was around, I used to cook—everything from American food to traditional Mexican food. I haven’t turned on the stove since he’s been gone. I also do Yoga and Pilates, and I love to read books.
Who has been your strongest supporter?
Family, Friends, and the Carbon Team have been my strongest supporters. And none of them are getting paid for any of this. They’ve taken time out of their busy schedules, away from their families, spouses, kids, and jobs, to be a part of something bigger than anything they have ever taken on before.
What do you do during your downtime?
I don’t have a lot of downtime. I’m busy with not only the Michael Alert, but I serve on a board at Michael’s former company, AT&T. There is now an award named after him for not only his years of dedication to the company but because of all the things he accomplished while there. In the history of AT&T, this has never been done before, and the award is nationwide. We’re coming up on almost two years since his untimely death, and I go to therapy every single week. That hasn’t stopped.
Do you have a support system with family and friends?
I do. My mom and my sister are key to my daily life. Michael’s family is also present. They’ve been extremely supportive. My mom loved Michael like a son. She always wanted to have a son but had two daughters instead. When it came time for me to get married, she was over the moon, that she was finally getting a son.
Tell me more about the MJ Award. What qualities are you looking for in the recipient of this award?
There are five big characteristics we look for.
1) Bold and fearless vision. Michael was bold and fearless. He would come up with crazy, outlandish ideas, but in some way, he would make them work. He was fearless because he didn’t care who he had to talk to or pitch something to. He would get whoever he needed to come on board to approve whatever it was.
2) Selfless and inclusive leadership. Michael was extremely selfless. He was a leader, everybody looked up to him, and he was very well respected.
3) Positive and uplifting presence. He was extremely positive. You never heard him say anything negative about anyone or anything.
4) Consistent willingness to go the extra mile. He worked hard. He even worked hard on his days off. He worked hard nights here at home. One person who currently works at AT&T is Lisa, she wrote me a sympathy card. It said, “We know how much MJ worked, and we know how much he sacrificed because he had such a good work ethic. We know how much he sacrificed time away from family and friends, even from you, Wendy. We thank you for sharing him with us.”
5) Creativity in the midst of chaos.
Do you lean on your faith for guidance and strength?
I was raised Catholic. Although I don’t go to church every Sunday, I am a firm Catholic believer. Michael and I got married in the Catholic Church. He was not raised Catholic, but when it came time for us to get married, he wanted to make me and my mother happy, and make his mom proud. He wanted to do things the right way, and he did it for me.
I do lean on my faith. In the early months after his passing, it was difficult because I questioned everything, including my faith. I would ask myself, “Why did God allow this to happen to us?” You can’t understand it or make sense of it, and your mind goes into a dark place. But my faith certainly helped and gave me strength.
Once the Michael Alert is in place, will you return to law and continue your studies?
I don’t know, only time will tell. I toyed with returning to education, but I don’t know. Perhaps my line of work, my calling, might be somewhere else. It’s ingrained in me now because Michael always said, “I love that you’re a teacher. It’s such an honorable job, but Wendy, I feel like you are destined for something bigger.”
Working on the alert, feels like something bigger than I could have imagined for myself. I would’ve never dreamed that I’d be working side by side with his former team which he used to manage trying to save lives. I don’t have a technology background.
What is your biggest wish right now?
I’ve never been asked that question, but I think the answer is simple. I know my biggest wish would be people to become more aware of how their decisions and the things they do affect other people. That goes hand in hand with the alert and this tech initiative I’m pitching. Every person that we’ve met, every person that we’ve spoken to, whether they choose to support us or not, has some type of effect.
In the long run, it will become a thing. You will see the Michael Alert come up on your phone. The longer this takes, the more people will continue to die on our freeways. Michael’s life couldn’t be saved because there wasn’t anything in place like a Michael Alert, but we can make it happen. We can do the right thing. We can help save innocent drivers from senseless deaths. Michael’s death cannot be in vain.
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