For many, the connotation of the word vulnerability is often that of allowing ourselves to be hurt physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Many of us have learned to view vulnerability as a weakness, as we can suffer harm. Yet the strength of vulnerability comes from understanding that we can withstand any injury because of our faith and inner peace.
To see vulnerability as a strength is to define it as the willingness to open your heart, to love, and to be loved with no assurances of external safety. It is a strength more powerful than any other as we must trust that we have the ability to get through anything, any heartache, any trauma, and any loss, and come through it on the other side still whole, still connected to the divine, still in love with ourselves and with others. Finding true vulnerability requires us to be present at the moment so as to release the sadness of the past and the anxiety of the future. When we work on this level of consciousness, faith, and trust, we naturally start to tune into unconditional love for ourselves and others, which emanates from each of us as an eternal light of love and healing.
Staying present and learning vulnerability is a practice, and those of us who have gone through trauma have more difficulty doing this than others. Through our life experiences, our brain has been re-wired, and we cannot access information as we previously had been able to. Moreover, the trauma is actually stored in our body, so it is not always about what happened to us but how our nervous system responded and integrated that experience. When we are stuck in this trauma response, we are stuck in darkness and fear; we cannot see the beauty of the world, the kindness of others, nor the lessons in a painful situation; therefore, we are unable to access the strength in vulnerability.
This does not occur only to those that have gone through severe trauma; it happens to everyone at times. Life is stressful, more and more every day. The past few years especially have taken a toll on marriages, friendships, physical health, mental health, and our ability to connect with others. None of us have escaped without being touched by the world.
When we live under stress, it is easy to believe the negative thoughts and stories that we have created in our solitude and allow them to replay like a tape in our minds throughout the day. Many of us have become conditioned to fear the future, of what may be, and of getting hurt. Our brain and body have developed different coping tactics as a means of inner protection so that we may survive the outer situation. We form defenses that do not allow us to feel joy.
However, living a life in fear of what may happen is not our only option. We have a choice of how we want to show up in this world. We have the ability to begin to change our lives at any and every moment. We have free will to work on being present at the moment and to release our stories. Stress in our daily life comes from looking at the past through a dark lens and from believing that we know what will occur in the future due to our perception of the past. In this manner, we may actually be creating a future we do not want. What if we can stop the tapes playing in our minds long enough to enjoy the present moment, long enough for us to be aware of the blessings that we do have? We can do this through meditation, prayer, or by simply noticing the touch of the air upon our skin, the feeling of our bodies being grounded into the earth, the taste in our mouths, or the sounds we hear. When we become present at the moment, lightness and awareness enter our bodies. Only this moment matters, and we can believe everything will work out for us, and we can be vulnerable.
Then, as we continue to breathe into the next moment, we find that it is through the cracks that we may allow the light in, the love to heal, and our trust to grow. Trust that there is more than what our eyes see. Trust that there is beauty in sorrow. Trust that we will find our peace. It is at this point, when we use our light to perceive the past and the present, we no longer see the faults and mistakes of ourselves or of others. We forgive all involved, and we dissolve any anger. Once we surrender into trust and release the need to control, we are able to be fully free and experience a limitless abundance of love, joy, and peace. When this occurs, our desires seamlessly flow toward us, knocking upon our door when we least expect them.
Yet how do we quiet our minds enough to allow ourselves to feel the present? True peace, and the strength of vulnerability of living life, fully comes from an inner sense of worth. Love can only arise when we are within ourselves. Putting the responsibility of our happiness on another is neither fair to ourselves nor to another. It creates the possibility of a dangerous cycle of stories and fear, and loss. When we can shift and recognize our own magic, we experience an energetic shift from fear to love. To keep our light shining and our hearts open, we must be mindful of with whom we surround ourselves; these boundaries are there to save our own souls and protect our hearts. They are an act of self-love. We must set boundaries and only allow those that cherish, respect, and see us as divine beings into our circle so as to keep the light shining within us.
Boundaries are one of the most beautiful and effective acts of self-love, thereby allowing the space for true vulnerability. To guard our own space, we do not need to be harsh; we learn to love others differently. For those that attempt to dim our light, we gently release them from our circle and love them from afar. We do this by knowing their soul is beautiful and loving the eternal part of them, yet realizing their personality, and their physical actions do not serve our goal to maintain our light. Remember, your light is your beauty, power, and gift. Treasure it, lean into it, and let it shine bright today and always.
By Susie Schroadter
